adding sass to life



i found my answer

October 7, 2008

I found out today that there is a part of every person’s brain that is just for stress; dealing with it, feeling it, working through it etc.  It just so happens that part is bigger in women’s brains than men’s.  Is that surprising?  Not to me.  It actually makes me feel relieved to know that is why I think the way that I do. 

Today I was in an elevator with a random male stranger and I had to pee really badly.  I pushed the wrong button and we went down instead of up and then the elevator stopped for probably 2.001 seconds and made a really strange noise and I immediately thought, “Oh great.  We are going to get stuck in this elevator and I am going to have to come up with something to talk to this weird guy about, oh my gosh, what if he is some sicko that has fantasies about getting trapped inside an elevator on his way to happy hour at Yard House with a young girl who used to be blonde and now is not.  Great.  I cannot defend myself in this small space.  Oh no.  And I have to pee.  Maybe I can pee on him if he tries anything frisky with me.  But what if he’s a nice guy?  And I have to pee?  Will he be polite enough to not mention anything if I just can’t hold it anymore?”  Yes, I thought all of those things in the 2.001 seconds that the elevator hesitated before going back up to the floor that I needed.

That very large section of my brain may explain this conversation too. 

I was relaxing at the lagoon in Hawaii with Jenielle a few months ago when I asked her, “Do you ever think weird thoughts?”  I think I got a blank stare from her when she responded, “Umm, like what?”  I said, “For example.  You see those paddle boats out there?  What would happen if you were snorkeling and one of the boats drove over you and your hair got wrapped up in the rudder on the bottom of the boat and it drove around the lagoon with you attached without even knowing it.  How would you get out?  How would you let them know you were trapped?  You couldn’t!  You would drown!  And then, the part that is almost worse is when the workers pull in the boat at night and find your limp lifeless body trapped on the bottom of the boat.”  Another blank, slightly disturbed stare from her.  “Hmm.  No.  I don’t have thoughts like that.”

How’s that for stress with a little crazy on the side?

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Comments

  1. * Beckey says:

    Dear Jamye
    Where are you? I miss your witty stories. Do come back soon and share with us what crazy misfortunes you’ve gotten yourself into.

    Love,
    Beckey

    | Reply Posted 8 years, 11 months ago


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