adding sass to life



all in a night’s work

May 1, 2009

I don’t think I handle stress very well.  Instead of working out, having lunch with friends, doing yoga, you know, things that would be good and healthy for me, I sit paralyzed stewing over whatever is going on, I space out, I get a nervous stomach, lose my appetite for healthy food, but chocolate?  Watch out.  That always seems to settle my nausea.  The biggest way I think I deal with stress is in my dreams.  I wish every one of you could get into my head for one night, you all would think I had taken some major hallucinogenics before going to bed.  

All of this occurred in this head of mine, last night…

-My cat got stolen and I filed a missing persons report.  When the cops found out that Callie Jack was not a person, but indeed a cat they threatened to taser me.  

-Nate and I decided to go to Mexico.  Why?  To try to fight the swine flu, why else?  We wanted to go on a service project to help the Mexicans who were suffering.  We were on a bus with 25 others.  We crossed the boarder and then we were in some sketchy part of Tijuana or some other place just as wretched as that and the Mexican cartel attacked our bus.  We were trying to tell them that we were trying to help them and definitely did NOT have any drugs and I think that just pissed them off even more. They only let 9 of us go through and the rest of them were taken away naked, including Nate.  I woke myself up sobbing saying, “Let him go!  He only wanted to help.”

-Then, Nate miraculously appeared on a boat with me and we were watching our wedding DVD (which we don’t have) with everyone else who was on our bus to Mexico.  We realized that somebody had taped over it with a documentary about finding jobs (which I am currently doing) and I was fascinated by the information that I wasn’t even mad that our wedding had been erased.  Yea, that is SO not me.  But since I was on a boat and didn’t have any cell phone service I missed the call that said that I got the job that I have had 6 interviews for in real life.  Since I didn’t get the phone call they gave the job to somebody else.  Sucky.  

-Then I had a dream that I was pregnant and I had a kid that was probably at least 15 lbs.  (Mom, it was just a dream.  No fat grand babies for you!  Sorry!)  

You guys should get in my head for a night.  Seriously.

The End.  

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